If you genuinely care about what you’re doing, no one can ever blame you for being “too passionate” about a cause. Everyone knows who the clout chasers are, and none of us like them. The ability to recognize when to apologize shows that you not only listened to words, but also heard the meaning behind them.Īpply the same in organizations you’re involved in, and be passionate about the work you’re doing. Remember that when your actions lead to unintentional little moments for others, and always be generous with apologies. In your little moments of hurt, you don’t expect an apology, but it’s always appreciated. Build a network that will at least be there to catch you when you fall so Yale doesn’t feel as lonely. The little moments are the times that set people off or trigger something from the past, so sharing your story means people at least know what your triggers are. At the same time, share your story with others so they can be more compassionate to you on your bad days. It’s easy to do on your good days, but it matters more on your bad ones. Your moment of kindness may be the first time they’re hearing positivity that day, and remember the kindness you would’ve wanted to hear on your worst day. Even if they mess up, they at least tried, so be the first to say thank you, and then be generous with thank yous to come. Understand that they are not trying to make your life harder, and their day may be going worse than yours. On your worst days, be kind to the person who messes up your favorite order at a restaurant or the dining hall worker or the person on the street. The trick is, it’s always easier said than done. So, how does one break into the ranks of leadership for college “popularity”? The answer is actually quite simple and sounds like the makings of a cliche Home Goods sign: be kind, be gracious, and share your story with others. But, if done well, notability is almost guaranteed, which makes the eyes of a surprisingly meritocratic selection process turn in your direction. Leadership in larger organizations is held to a higher standard because the trust put in them is not only for how likable they are, but also their weight of maintaining the reputation of their organization. Yale’s popularity contest culminates in who is elected to leadership positions in any of the spaces mentioned, mainly to distinguish any one person from another. The degrees of separation between any two Yalies is limited because of the vast overlap, and eventually, everyone at least knows of each other or knows someone who does. Most Yalies transcend those divides by getting involved on campus through athletics, extracurriculars, cultural houses, Greek life, jobs, and occasionally classes. In high school the word was popular, but with fourteen different Yale bubbles, there are just as many popular circles. I cannot speak for Skull & Bones, nor do I want to, but here is what I have gathered to explain what notability means here. One of the aspects of membership into the oldest and “most powerful” societies on Yale’s campus, which is widely known, is that the individuals selected are among the most notable on campus. Everything that occurs in one of the most exclusive spaces on campus has been published online amid rumors and lies, and it becomes our job to decide which parts are true when privacy is maintained. The real answer is something can be private but not a secret. So, you may be wondering how spaces like secret societies exist, especially with an air of mystery. It does not take long to realize that everyone’s business is known, which can be a double-edged sword. That information then becomes social currency for making or maintaining friendships on a campus that is, at times, too small for its own good. All it takes is for one person to see who walks in and out of the silly building on High Street for the membership of Yale’s most reputable society to be known. Secrets do not exist at Yale, including the secrecy of societies.
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